Saturday, January 24, 2009

It's a bittersweet day when you realize it's time to "grow up",continue forward towards your future and leave those behind who are holding you back of slowing you down. I think I have been hiding from this day for the past year and half. But now with my surgery coming closer and closer I know I need to face all my fears and reservations so that the day I get out of the hospital I can not only start my new healthy life physically, but start it emotionally healthy as well. I don't know why I have the fear of letting go of my past. Well I think I have a little idea but I am still not fully sure why. My whole life I have feared change. I feel over the years I have become much better at accepting and making the best of the changes in my life. I don't know why when I think of change I think the worst. This year so far has all been good change. Everything that has changed in my life in the past 9 months has been for the better and has made me a better person. I think I have conditioned myself to fear it for so long, my mind doesn't know any better.
So I have about 3 weeks or so until my life changes forever, FOR THE BETTER. Before that day comes I have to face all my fears face on and tell them they will not be coming into this next part of my life. As hard has that is going to be...I know in my heart and my mind it will be for the absolute best. I have LET negative people and food run my life for the past 19 years. They controlled my mind and body, but never again will I allow them to have that power. I told myself every day that I am in control but I never truly believed it. The day I finally started to believe myself was the day I began to make actual changes in my life. I have not looked back since and it feels great!


Personal Quote of the day:"Find out who you are, and do it on purpose!"

No comments:

Post a Comment

Followers